Monday, 19 September 2016

Falling off the stage.


So I'm going to talk about two things. One that has happened and one that is about to happen. 
Sorry, hello by the way. Oh and this is a long one, you may want to get a brew.

So, around March time this year, some butt head , or maybe a few butt heads , put me foreword for a Parenting Blog Award. The Mum and Dad (MAD) blog awards to be exact. I didn't even know there was such a thing and was raising the flesh above my eye (note I couldn't raise a eyebrow, I had non) and wondering what this would all be about. I'll be honest, other than The Unmumsy Mum and The Sun Will Come Up I've never really read any blogs. I was completely unaware that there are bloody millions of them flying around in cyber space covering everything from life with an ingrown toenail to different ways to style your dog.
The only other blogs I had experienced were a quick glance at Cancer ones, and let me tell you, us Cancer Folk can be a depressing little bunch at times.  So I was chuffed. And I thought I'd give a couple of the people who 'follow' me a chance to vote. I'll be honest, I've actually got no idea how many people read my blog.
How do you know? 
I know how many 'hits'  I've had (cannot get the vision of me sucking on a bong when i say this) but regular followers? No idea. 
So yeah I asked you to vote if you felt like I deserved it. Not because I've got cancer and you feel sorry for me, but if you actually thought my writing was 'best.' 
Anyway, that was March / April time and they kept us hanging on until the 16th September to find out the results.  
We were asked to turn up at a hotel in Laaannnddaannn Taannn  (or London) and eat some food and chuck a load of wine down our necks so of course I said yes.
My friend Lizzie and I went halves on a hotel room (it was still like 10 million pounds) and off we went. 

So, it all started really well. I dumped the boys on my mum, had radiotherapy at 945am, tucked my crispy non-tit into a shitty old granny bra with my fake foam dome boob, and hauled ass to Bristol Temple Meads train station. I queued up for my ticket and the man behind the desk said "I Love your haircut by the way" My automatic response was "what?" He replied  "Your hair cut. It's nice" and I looked at him and he wasn't laughing!!!!!  He was actually being serious!!! Then I remembered.....I'm not bloody bald anymore am I! My hair has actually gone from Cancer hair to hair hair. Awesome. I realise its the first compliment I've had about my appearance that has come from someone who isn't just being nice to the woman with Cancer. It's a real compliment!!!!! So Thank you Temple Meads Man, and may I say I liked the skin you were wearing on your head too. It was lush! 

So, I get to London and I meet some of my favourite people...my old work mates (I better not name them as I think they may have been scivving) and I tell them about how posh my hotel is - The Royal Garden Hotel in Kensington don't you know. When I checked in the lady asked "can I give your bags to this gentlemen" and gesticulated towards some kind of Beefeater and I blurted "why where's he taking them?" and of course she replied "um, to your room." Well Posh!!

I go to the room to get ready and I think 'wow. A shower without children opening the door and asking me what I'm doing or bowling in and taking a toddler-wee next to the cubicle which inevitably goes down the wall and across their feet.' Peace at last.
I dump all my clothes on the floor and step into the shower slamming the door firmly behind me....or so I thought. 
I'm blissfully shaving my legs, a chore that has only recently re-entered my life, checking out my radiation burns and noting how I seem to have got off lightly so far. I'm carefully washing off my eyebrows, oblivious to the Tsunami that was washing across the posh bathroom floor. 
Shower is turned off and I go to step out of the cubicle, I notice how shiny the floor tiles are as I can literally see my reflection. I stamp my giant hobbit foot onto the tiles and my reflection starts to 'ripple,' not unusual given the state of my body at the moment, but then my face wobbles away!!!! Oh shit!!!! Has radiation caused my face to fall off? NOOOO then it dawns on me I've flooded the pissing bathroom haven't I!  Not only that but that granny bra and fake foam dome tit are they only ones I have with me and one is fully submerged under 3inches of posh water and 'Soap and Glory' suds and the other is floating towards the heated towel rail. Bollocks!!!! I scoop up the sodden mess and dump it on the shelf behind the bog while I rush around naked in the bathroom, mopping up water with the bath mat, one tit swinging freely in the air.
I finally get all the floor water down the sink and go to retrieved the bra, foam dome and other clothes off the shelf and I shit you not, I dropped them in the bastard toilet!!! 
Well, I don't have a spare!! It's 45 mins until launch and I have no spare tit and nothing to put it in. I can see visions of myself sitting in my dress talking to a real blogger and suddenly a wet bra shape emerges through my dress. 
My buggery bollocks!!! I try stuffing all my clothes on the heated towel rail. Slipping the boob down the back. Too slow.....Where's the free hairdryer????
So that's what I did. I dried my shower/toilet water sodden tit and bra with the complimentary hair dryer. Then off I went. Oh actually I put clothes on first you understand. 

So it was a drinks reception first and I met some other bloggers who were lovely. I quickly learnt that 'hi I'm Heidi' is as pointless as wrapping presents for a 3 month old. People would raise their lovely hairy eyebrows at me and I quickly learned to introduced myself as 'STORM IN A TIT CUP'....it was....different. Kinda cool. I couldn't wait to meet someone who might say 'hi I'm HAIRY BALLS - PRIVATE SCHOOLS' or 'nice to meet you I'm OH SO HAPPY CRAPPY NAPPY' or even 'alright my dear I'm MY TODDLER THE SHITHEAD' but alas people are equally as sensible as me. 

We had dinner and just before they began to announce the winners I rushed off to the traps for my millionth wee of the night and the smallest most delicate of lady-poo's ...nerves, alcohol and the lasting effects of 10 months of chemotherapy. And bless, there was another blogger throwing out much more than words....my god the poor lady. After Friday her Twitter name is probably @chundercatsarego, @vomitcomet or @leastihadabucket. Awful. I provided a jug of water and back I went. 

So the awards began and there were many category's and I really enjoyed hearing about all the blogs and made notes to follow these amazing people. But by far the best part for me was when the entertainment started...and by that I mean when another blogger fell off the stage. This gorgeous blonde in a black dress went ass over tit down the back of the stage and I had a front row seat!!!! 
There was a rumble and I looked over to see two sculpted legs go flying into the air, they were akimbo  and I saw a flash of black material or very dark beaver hair followed by feet and then gasps from the audience. I did what any good person would do and cheered!!!! Well someone needed to break the silence!!! I then sat down and I'm ashamed to say I howled for at least 12 minutes, to the point of tears. I'm so sorry lady with lovely legs, but your fall made my night! I salute you!! You styled it out too by waving your arms in the air, awesome. 

It then got to the Best Writer category and I listened as they described this blog that showed humour despite the subject matter, bravery in the face of adversity and sheer courage. And I must say I was proud when I heard them say that was my blog. But I was also sad because I cannot believe this is my life. I often think my life is like the elaborate plot on a soap and GoogleBox lounges would scream 'oh that's crap, as if that would ever happen to one person' , but it's real and it's all true. And it's fucking awful. 
But I will say again, I cannot let my little boys lives be swallowed up by darkness. I cannot let my little girls memory be clouded by what is happening to me. 
So when I won the award, I cried. And not because I was greatful, although I was extremely greatful, I cried because this means I've done something positive. It will make my three children proud, and Scouse (who is already extremely proud) prouder and really all my friends, family and the virtual friends I've made who have supported me the whole way along and into the future. 
I dedicated my award to my boys, my little girl in heaven and to the lady being sick in the toilet. I wish I had added stage fall lady too because she got up, dusted off her fabulous self and kept on going. I feel I can relate to that stage fall. In all manner of ways.
Trying to look posh
The other thing I need to tell you is that GoogleBox may well get a chance to question my plot. When I was pregnant with Ally I allowed a documentary crew into my life in the hope of raising awareness of Inflammatory Breast Cancer and Cancer in pregnancy. I wanted to do my bit. They filmed everything and most beautifully, the moment my daughter Ally was born. 
Ally's 8 days with us, short but electrified by love. 
I decided to carry on with the documentary as Ally had a lot more to say and I could facilitate that. See, she is her mothers daughter and we never give up.

Ally is with me, always. 
She was with me as I accepted my award. She was with me when I watched the documentary and I cried very hard. And she is with me all the nights I lie awake thinking of her. She gives me courage in the darkest of times and bravery in the face of adversity. 
I would love it if you could watch it. It goes out in the UK and Ireland on 26th September on TLC. It's under the title 'Extraordinary Pregnancies.'

There are further dates below. These can change and I'll let you know if they do. It will also go out in USA at some point, again I'll let you know. I will also post updates on Facebook: Storm In a Tit Cup by Heidi and Twitter:  @storminatitcup


So, I sign off tonight whilst watching Poldark, looking at my award glinting from the table. 'Storm In A Tit Cup' has now been active for 10 months and I know that despite what prognosis-paperwork-crap says about me, I'll still be writing it in 10 years. Who knows if anyone will still read it and what the hell I'll be waffling about but to all you butt heads who voted and to those of you that didn't, thank you. Thank you for your continued support which never fails to choke me up. Please know I read every single comment that you write even though I don't always reply, they are all so gratefully received. 

I never did see toilet spew lady again that night but she will have gone home and woken up with no memory, a mouth like a Tramps pants and the abs of a god from all the heaving but I won't forget her. A stark reminder that even in the poshest of hotels life isn't always picture perfect. 

And to stage fall lady, high fucking five. Keep your pants black, or your growler hairy.... You never know when you might fall off the stage but it's getting back up that matters X

Extraordinary Pregnancy Dates 

Poland - TLC - 19th Septmber 
Africa - TLC Entertainment - 21st September 
Europe Pan Region - TLC - 24th September 
Hungary - TLC - 24th September 
UK - TLC - 26th September 
Ireland - TLC - 26th September 
Arabia - TLC - 4th October 
Italy - Real Time - 6th October 
Denmark - TLC - 6th October 
Norway - TLC - 6th October 


Sweden - TLC - 6th Ocotber 

58 comments:

  1. Awesome. You're a genuine boner-fidee star! x

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  2. I am so happy for you Heidi! That is an awesome win, and very well deserved. You do have a gift for writing. And I know that I look forward to 'what will she write next? I can't wait to read it.

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  3. Brilliant read, well deserved hun xxx

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  4. Heidi.... you just make me laugh and cry at the same time, you remind me of moments I've had with Danielle, the things we laughed about that others would have thought inappropriate. You remind me that life is precious... for living and I think you're awesome. Ally will be so proud of her Mummy, Dani will be taking care of her for you. Lots of love xx

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  5. Oops, I shouldn't have read this at work as I'm now trying frantically to wipe the mascara from underneath my eyes from laughing and crying at the same time!! Thoroughly deserved. I have been reading your blog/FB statuses ever since your friend Gemma shared and have shed many a tear for you. You sound one amazing woman.

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  6. Glad to know I'm not the only one who floods hotel bathrooms! Awesome work and I know your positivity is helping so many others face their own journeys and also making us whiney ones realise we have nothing to whine about....Keep on keeping on ILLEGITIMI NON CARBERUNDUM to them all!!! xx

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  7. Sarah just summed it up....ILLEGITIMI NON CARBERUDUN xxx Your words are so inspiring I've created my own f**k it list and I'm about to advertise your blog on my very first and only marathon....so keep up the good work!!!! Xxx

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  8. Watched you in Poland today. You are so brave and amazing! You are a great mother and 100% fighter! Good luck and lot of health!! Greetings from Poland ❤

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  9. I just saw Extraordinary Pregnancy (Poland) & I can just say YOU ARE AWESOME! And so full of love and happy! I'm your big fan from this moment so you can writte your blog even next 20 years :) Wish you the best and still be strong - for yourself and for every of us. (Sorry about my awful english, I hope its all understandable - I'm a much better talker :D ) Kiss! Paulina

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  10. Hello there! I albo watched You in Poland toady. I've decided to right you a message because I think you're absolutely amazing! My husband and I are trying to have a baby for a year now. I miscarried a very young pregnancy 4 months ago. Today when I watched your story I cried the whole time! It is absolutely amazing how you deal with everything that's happening in your life. Thank You for being such an inspiring and amazing person! Hope you will be cancer free very soon <3 best regards to You and your wonderful Family! - Kasia form Poznan, Poland

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  11. Heidi! Look at all the countries you are going to be in! That's friggin amaze balls. As per usual you have made me laugh out loud and sob unceremoniously in equal measures. Thank you. Keep going. XXX

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  12. Heidi! Look at all the countries you are going to be in! That's friggin amaze balls. As per usual you have made me laugh out loud and sob unceremoniously in equal measures. Thank you. Keep going. XXX

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  13. Heidi - you are just magic .... will be looking out for your programme in NZ xxx

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  14. Well done Heidi. Got the Sky box on record. Looking forward to watching it! Xx

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  15. Congratulations on your wonderful and deserved award Heidi! I have a close relative with cancer and you are helping me so much with understanding what life with it is all about and reminding me just how important family and friends are. Xx Pete (a fellow ex-Gordano peep)

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  16. Hi..Heidi I'm so proud of you...watching you on tv right now (South Africa)...xx lots of love

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  17. Love your amazing positivity and awesome hum our , Watched your story on TLC in South Africa . You are inspirational , keep writing , I will keep reading ��

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  18. Love your amazing positivity and awesome hum our , Watched your story on TLC in South Africa . You are inspirational , keep writing , I will keep reading ��

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  19. Wow..just watched the programme in South Africa through teary eyes. You are a true inspiration! Looking forward to your blog posts.xx

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  20. Wow..just watched the programme in South Africa through teary eyes. You are a true inspiration! Looking forward to your blog posts.xx

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  21. You are fantastic! What a laugh. I'll be tuning in to the documentary from Ireland. I'll keep reading too, through to the next decade x

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  22. Hi Heidi long time your doing fab and make me laugh my ass of boys look great love sarah & aj��

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  23. Hi Heidi long time your doing fab and make me laugh my ass of boys look great love sarah & aj��

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  24. Hi Heidi. I've just finished watching your documentary in South Africa. My heart goes out to you on the loss of you precious daughter. You are truly inspiring and I simply adore your sense of humour. You deserve only happiness from here on out, and that's what I wish for you. May all your bucket and spade wishes be realised. Love Coral x

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  25. I think you are one amazing courageous lady and i salute you xx you deserved the award I cry and laugh at your blog.. your children will be so proud of you xxx leanne xxx

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  26. In the middle of watching your documentary in Malta and had to look you up to see your progress. So sorry for your family's loss of Ally; I shed tears with you. What a great partner and family you have and deservedly so, you are an incredible woman. Stay strong, keep your humour and love as hard as you can. Good luck Heidi.

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  27. Hi ! Just wanted to say love your humour in the face of hardship! And just FYI saw the programme(cried my eyes out) you really are an inspiration! Greetings from Kenya

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  28. Hi Heidi you don't know me but I have the audacity to think I know you somewhat through this blog. Carnival Day Portishead 2016. I was the grand-SMOTHER as I am called, with the little girl dressed as Little Mermaid, and the family dog dressed as Sebastian. You stepped forward, smiled warmly and clapped as we walked through. I so wanted to say something along the lines of 'you're an inspiration Heidi, but couldn't. I thought you may have felt angry that you weren't pushing Ally through the High Street as a disney character. I realise I was so wrong. You are so 'unjealous, unblaming, to the point you revelled in a little girl's day in the carnival when you had lost your own. So you truly are an example of selflessness, bravery and compassion. God Bless You. (And I don't even believe in the twat lololol xxx)

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  29. Heidi I just watched the documentary. You are unbelievably inspirational, myself and himself laughed and cried and I applaud you. I am 24 weeks pregnant on my little girl and I sobbed when you lost ally and all we kept thinking was shit that would be like missy moo being born in 4 weeks!!! You were so calm and put together and candid. I love how honest you are and you now have another person reading your blog :) you fully deserve that award and your boys have an amazing mummy!! Xxx

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  31. My family and I accidentally stumbled across your documentary tonight and sat glued to the screen from start to finish, with tears pouring down our cheeks. Your are so inspiring (at least as much so as JK Rowling!) and your family, Ally included, must be so proud of you, and the beautiful spirit which you continue to sport, despite the terrible 'luck' which has befallen you. Your blog made me laugh and laugh and laugh and I absolutely love it. I wish you all the best, and hope for you a heathy future full of love and laughs! And more insightful, interesting and hilarious blog posts! Much love xxxx

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  32. I just read your piece, not sure what I was expecting but proper laughed out loud. I too had a baby after bc, very different from your story, but Hello x

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  33. Absolutely inspirational lady. Watched your documentary lastnight and am humbled by how brave you have been through everything. Such a fighter. Fab blog by the way and an amazing sense of humour. X

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  34. Absolutely inspirational lady. Watched your documentary lastnight and am humbled by how brave you have been through everything. Such a fighter. Fab blog by the way and an amazing sense of humour. X

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  39. Hi,
    I have just watched you on TLC UK x your story moved me from crying to positivity and back. Ultimately I am humbled x I was diagnosed with primary breast cancer(stage 3)March this year. April I had a single macectomy;May Lymph Node removal(spread a little but hopefully stopped in tracks now ��) My final chemotherapy is tomorrow - yey! I have remained positive throughout but it does get tougher as time goes on so as you know those little goals at each stage mean lots x Your honesty and positivity will motivate me tomorrow (and throughout my Radiotherapy) We can all learn a lesson from you as you continue to hope and thrive(with your little butterfly by your side always). You are one of the angels on earth who have 'survived' the most devastating (and any mother will know that's NOT having cancer yourself!)event that can happen to anyone! I wish you all the luck and positivity possible because truly good people like you should thrive - not because you are 'brave'(although that is a fact however fed up you get of hearing it! Not being brave (ultimately as we all deserve a meltdown or two in private!) isn't an option 4 people like you) but because you just 'get on' and appreciate all around you. I wish the hypochondriac's, work dodging, uncaring, selfish, aggressive, 'me me me' people would read your blog and get their NHS/tax draining bums off the sofa and do some good in this world!! rant over ;-) I have never read or written on a blog b4 so forgive the length! BUT finally I have succeeded in 3 of your 'really important' bucket list points (albeit 2 before diagnosis) and I am determined to do the others. My children, like yours are my world xx I want to see them continue to grow into the caring, considerate, motivated, healthy and happy adults that I know they can be. I am lucky to have a lovely network of friends, family and wider community who can help me achieve that for them x you have that too x keep your wings lifted and your humour sharp ; know that your journey is an inspiration to others xxxx

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    2. On my 'rant' I just meant leave resources for those who can't help themselves and for those(like us) in our moments of need! I believe everyone should help themselves and help those who can't do that. Put back what you can however small, contribute (a friendly smile/chat can help those feeling low and empower them to feel good about themselves again)So many lovely messages on this blog - shows that there are more caring people than not in thus world x be kind!xx

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  40. Congratulations on your award! You are so brave and an inspiration. I am the same age as you and like you have two young children, I really don't think I could cope or be as wonderfully brave as you are. I am in awe of your strength. I'm sat here watching your documentary in tears, so sorry for the loss of baby Ally. Stay strong, much love to you and your wonderful family. Xxx

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  41. Oops 4th try(novice blogger - much prefer to read!) so may as well add a postscript!

    'If you can be anything in this world - be kind' unknown

    What lovely societies we would have if that was the main goal!

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  42. You are an inspirational woman. Your story reduced me to tears & you're the brave one!! The C word, as I like to call it ( it doesnt deserve its full name!) As affected me & my family over the years & as recent as one month ago. Stay strong, you lovely, strong brave lady. Xxxx

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  43. Heidi,
    I have never read your blog before and I did tonight. It really made me laugh. And the way you live life, with such a strong connection to your daughter, is so amazing to me. You are not bitter, ugly and angry like some stage 4 cancer ladies can be. Humor is so important, thanks for reminding me, as I'm a metastatic breast cancer patient as well in the US (New Jersey).
    Keep on rocking for as long as you can!!!

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  44. Found your blog after watching the doc on tlc. Firstly I want to say I was moved to tears (okay giant racking sobs and lots of snot!) But also so so inspired by your humour and courage in the face of what would make most crumble and hide under the duvet forever. I'm sure you hear that a lot and it probably sounds cliché but I mean it from my heart. Your willingness to allow a film crew into your lives, especially at such a tragic time was brave and inspiring. I'm so sorry for your loss of beautiful Ally. What a bundle of gorgeousness!

    My mum is also a cancer warrior, skin cancer with brain, lung, bowel and liver mets. She has battled so hard and bravely with 3lots of chemo, 3rounds of radio and several lots of immunotherapy. It left her bald and housebound yet boy has she fought. She doesn't have long left but at the end she will know she's given cancer a good hiding and didn't win, oh no, cancer doesn't get to win anymore. Every day you, my mum and millions of others fight, it loses.

    You've made me laugh- howl out loud with even some snorting! Cry too but also reminded me that cancer isn't you, it isn't my mum. There's so much more to you, to her and we have to fight to keep laughing and just enjoy every moment we have no matter what's going on.

    Your boys and beautiful little girl are so lucky to have you as their mum and so are we, you've raised so much awareness and inspired and encouraged so many through your writing (the comments on the end of your posts prove that!). Thank you.

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  45. Found your blog after watching the doc on tlc. Firstly I want to say I was moved to tears (okay giant racking sobs and lots of snot!) But also so so inspired by your humour and courage in the face of what would make most crumble and hide under the duvet forever. I'm sure you hear that a lot and it probably sounds cliché but I mean it from my heart. Your willingness to allow a film crew into your lives, especially at such a tragic time was brave and inspiring. I'm so sorry for your loss of beautiful Ally. What a bundle of gorgeousness!

    My mum is also a cancer warrior, skin cancer with brain, lung, bowel and liver mets. She has battled so hard and bravely with 3lots of chemo, 3rounds of radio and several lots of immunotherapy. It left her bald and housebound yet boy has she fought. She doesn't have long left but at the end she will know she's given cancer a good hiding and didn't win, oh no, cancer doesn't get to win anymore. Every day you, my mum and millions of others fight, it loses.

    You've made me laugh- howl out loud with even some snorting! Cry too but also reminded me that cancer isn't you, it isn't my mum. There's so much more to you, to her and we have to fight to keep laughing and just enjoy every moment we have no matter what's going on.

    Your boys and beautiful little girl are so lucky to have you as their mum and so are we, you've raised so much awareness and inspired and encouraged so many through your writing (the comments on the end of your posts prove that!). Thank you.

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  46. I watched my extraordinary pregnancy today Heidi and all I can say is "feckin amazeballs!! Your story moved me more than the mini cruise boat I've just come off of whilst on my holibobs! Your story is inspiring and how you've kept going despite the adversities you have faced! Hats off to you girl! I loved the hotel bathroom story haha! That's me all over, fur coat and nae knickers! Can't take me anywhere, least of all a posh hotel haha! I look forward to reading about your future escapades in your blogs and wish you well luv! P.s those boys of yours are just adorable 💕 Jacqui Brennan xx

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  47. I watched my extraordinary pregnancy today Heidi and all I can say is "feckin amazeballs!! Your story moved me more than the mini cruise boat I've just come off of whilst on my holibobs! Your story is inspiring and how you've kept going despite the adversities you have faced! Hats off to you girl! I loved the hotel bathroom story haha! That's me all over, fur coat and nae knickers! Can't take me anywhere, least of all a posh hotel haha! I look forward to reading about your future escapades in your blogs and wish you well luv! P.s those boys of yours are just adorable 💕 Jacqui Brennan xx

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  48. Sitting here watching your'e story here from norway... 6 months pregnant and my tears are running down my chin. I am so sorry for the loss of baby Ally. After watching this i feel so blessed ... and greatful for my health and my baby's. Cant forget your'e amazing positiv spirit. You go Heidi! I wish you and your'e familiy the best.
    Love and good wishes from Suzanna Berisha.

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  49. You.
    Your strength.
    Your love.
    Im in awe.


    Tonje, Oslo (����)

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  50. I saw your documentary just now and had to check out your blog as well. And I have to say I am in awe of you. The way you choose to think and live despite what you have- and are gong trough is so inspirational. I'm so sorry for the loss of your little daughter, but it's wonderful to see that you keep on fighting for your boys.

    Best wishes from Norway

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  51. Hi Heidi, I saw the documentary about your story and about your Ally, i' m 35 weeks pregnant and your story hurt me and while I was watching the tv I was crying and I felt stupid because instead you always smile! From Italy best wishes I'm sure you'll be soon out of the storm and you will see your rainbow

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  52. Hi! I have just watch the episode on TLC (extraordinary pregnancies). That just broke my heart! Crying my eyes out through the night. I've lost my mom to cancer in 2013, she had breastcancer and removed the breast, but 5months later she got cancer in her loweback and it spread ro kidney and lung.. and still can't deal with that. To see you full of life around your family is amazing! I thought my mom was strong, but you dear! I have no words!! Amazing! Wish you and your family the best! Lots of Love from Norway <3

    renate_olsen89@hotmail.com

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  53. Hello, I just wanted to say that I saw the documentary in the UK on TLC, you are truly an amazing and brave individual. Everything that happens in our lives does so for a reason. No decision or turn in our lives is ever wrong. Through good and bad times you have shown the very best of humanity. I thank you so much. Continue to keep smiling and being beautiful. Best wishes Nicole (London)

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  54. Hi! My friend Pauline from Bristol passed me your bucket list yesterday online. Asking kindly if I could do anything to help "this lady with request number 1". Promised to do my best, to spread positivity and make your list visible to Santa. High fives to lives and best greetings from Northern Finland, Elf Eija

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  56. I am so proud of you! I just saw you on my tv, I'm from Buenos Aires, Argentina. I was watching it with my mom and we both love your strength and we admire you.
    I hope everything's fine!
    Xoxo
    Luciana

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